shonzilla's Qype profile

Two weeks ago I had the most unpleasant meal in Hamburg ever. You can read about a similar unpleasant experience that caught some other reviewers by surprise, who also had no prior experience with Mr. Cherng.

Namely, they asked us to pay 50c for each uneaten piece of sushi without making sure we knew about this rule beforehand.

Here’s what happened: Before we were even finished with the meal, a guy was standing next to our table and showing us a “warning leaflet” sitting on the table describing this unusual “rule” they have, basically counting them as he spoke with us. I’ve been to many all-you-can-eat sushi restaurants and I never witnessed anything similar. I should mention that we didn’t notice the leaflet which was in German only anyway (tourist trap anyone?) and that they haven’t warned such practice in advance. Our rejection to pay for something unusual that should be made perfectly clear (with illustrations of what constitutes an “uneaten sushi” – is it half-eaten, without filling or whatever?) created quite a commotion among the staff. The guy also shamelessly used an argument of hungry children in Africa and I did them a favor by avoiding a Socratic dialog that could have ensured at that point. Get this: you’re not able to take with you the sushi pieces left on your plate! Are they going to sent it priority mail to Africa?! Something tells me then won’t. Anyway, the staff was very aggressive, obviously totally uninterested in improving the horrible impression they left (to some other guests who overheard our discussion) and my coolness totally left them confused.

The manager we called for wasn’t around, even though they initially bluffed by “threatening” to call the manager at one point. Eventually, another worker (either a more senior worker or supervisor) gave us a normal bill and “let us go” as if they were doing us a favor. Since I really didn’t want my afternoon ruined by some tactless a-holes, I made sure I didn’t think about them during the day but sure I didn’t leave the place with a pleasant taste in my mount. However, this experience left me thinking about the poor kids working in Chinese factories for 12+ hours and their managers-from-hell if this is what you can experience in Hamburg as a customer.

Sushi aside, the rest of the food was mostly different permutations of vegetables with chicken, beef or cheapest fish food soaked in wok sauce, where you realize what you’re eating much more with your eyes than with your sense of taste. Even before the “uneaten sushi would have been eaten by hungry African children” incident, your attention span permitting, you’ll get the feeling that the staff just wants to sit you down and then watch who else might me coming in and whether anyone has left any sushi.

They get 2 stars because some food wasn’t too generic which improves the the low service rating. If you just want to fill your bowel, then you might rate them with 4-5 stars. Myself, I have eaten much better sushi at low to fair prices.

Pro tip: If you go here to get full, make sure you don’t leave any uneaten pieces of sushi.