Two Floors, Soho, London

There's not many places I'd less rather be, with the possible exception of Wormwood Scrubs and/or with Jim Davidson, than Soho on a Friday night. Particularly when it precedes a Bank Holiday Weekend.

So, no surprise, last night here was ridiculously busy. There were bodies spread about on every spare bit of space like the immediate aftermath of a shipwreck, and getting served would have tried the patience of the Dalai Lama in deep meditation after being spiked with a cocktail of chill out drugs.

It's a minor benefit that the throngs can burst out into Kingly Court, but only minor. Nothing to get your pants in a pirouette about here as far as I could see. It's a bar. In Soho. Full as full can be with people that live or work in Soho. Does that make it trendy or cool? Nope.

On a slow Soho evening the post ironic crowd cram into two floors. Service is always poor, annoying people are seated around the bar so without bumping into everyone you will remain thirsty. Red stripe only on tap, enough said.

Like with the sudden passing of MJ, I may well be the last (important) person to hear of this little gem. There’s something likeable about a bar that’s too cool to put it’s branding ont he walls, or outside, or even give their customers some hint where the hell they are. This said, it was remarkably full when I stopped by for an after work drink last Thursday. Weirdly it’s their almost anti-branding that make them popular - the bar menu isn’t remarkably inspiring, their mojitos were good but not cocktail bar good or fancy, and the only beer they have on tap here is the Jamaican one, which doesn’t matter to me as I’m not a beer drinker but I imagine many of my friends would kick up a stink.

They’re borderline 'we don’t care what you think we cater for our fans’ and a little smug, but something about the place did tickle my fancy and so I will definitely return.

I think this is supposed to be a bit of a trendy place. It certainly looks like it could be kind of cool. Dark and minimalistic, you might not even know what the venue is used for when its not open.

Maybe it’s some peoples cup of tea but I just don’t like this kind of bar. They had 1 thing on tap, a Jamaican lager which may well be the worst lager I’ve ever tasted (and I’ve drank Stella!), it was just all fizz. A couple of other lagers and ales were available in vastly overpriced bottles.

We did not stay long.

Nice cosy place. The staff were friendly and the place was filled with normal folk. One beer on tap but a nice selection of other drinks including a mean french martini. We managed to hog the two couches by the window for a majority of the night so we were sitting comfortably. There were others who were perched on some rickety looking stools though which i wouldn’t trust myself on after a couple of bottles.

Great place for an after work/start of night drink. Tucked nicely into Kingly Court, this place is really buzzy and in my opinion very cool.

another favourite; used to go here a lot when I worked in Soho. not as much of a secret anymore now that Kingly Court has been opened up, but still great for lunch and after works drinks. glad it’s still there after all those years …

A Soho bar that has been there almost as long as I have been in London is something pretty refreshing frankly.

I remember first going there in about 1997 and thinking it was great, and have come back many a time since then, although my trip last night was the first in a year or so.

The genius with Two Floors is that is was never uber-cool, just quite comfy with itself as being a good friendly bar and because of this it has never really hit the heights of impossible to get into/served at, but it has also not lost all its customers to another bar as they migrate to the latest and greatest.

The top bar is long and the main room is fairly spacious with sofas, wooden seats and low tables dotted around the place. The basement bar is slightly random with some sort of Hawiian style decor going on. It’s low lit and doesn’t get a huge amount of light in because of its position so think New York bar experience for that part of the atmosphere. It’s a friendly place as well and always feels a very comfortable place to hang out in.

Only has the one beer on tap - but its the very good Kirin and reasonably priced. Has a fairly good selection of bottled beers too. Does some good cocktails for around £6 as well.

I’m not so sure about the service these days. I might have hit it on a bad night, but it was pretty amateur last night with the selection of who was next seeming to be totally random.

Overall though a really good bar and a true stalwart of the Soho scene.

Worth noting - I don’t think it’s ever had a sign outside, so note the address. It’s pretty obvious its a bar from the outside, but you won’t find the name there.

A favourite bar of mine, discovered about a year ago when looking for somewhere central with an outdoor area. As soon as my friend and I walked in, we both said the place reminded us of Manchester - simply and slightly retro decorated, with normal people rather than your usual dressed up, suited up rich kids who normally drink around Carnaby Street. The bar is averagely priced - another bonus considering its location. Music is eclectic and not too loud. The downstairs is dark and cosy and there are some tables for us smokers outside. Cute bar staff to appreciate too. Perfect especially for after work drinks.

Of all the bars in this area of Soho, this has to be one of my favourites. Yeah it’s trendy but not TOO trendy and they do a great selection of cocktails as well as all the usual beers, alongside a pretty decent selection of wines.

Most of the bar staff are sickeningly good looking, but I suppose that’s no bad thing. The atmosphere’s great with nice dim lighting and enough tables so you don’t have to stand around all night.

One to put on your ‘where shall we go next’ list for when the pubs close.

A great place to meet for a drink before dinner or have a few afterwards, Two Floors has got several tables and a few comfy sofas on the ground floor at the main bar, and a tiki-esque second bar on the lower ground floor. The back doors let out onto the courtyard at the back of Carnaby Street, so there’s plenty of space to spill out on crowded evenings.

Ciabatte are served during the day, and students and in-between-meetings media types (like me) can usually be found camped out on the sofas in the back. Excellent and well-priced caipiroskas, decent wine and friendly staff keep it on my Soho shortlist.