Your own steam room activities!!! not really the right behaviour in a public place. I think you should be looking for places in other parts of London for that kind of thing.
The Porchester Centre, Queensway, London W2 5HS
I visited this spa with a girl to treat her/me to a relaxing sunday afternoon :)
The price was very good value for money, i think it was about £30 for both of us, your given 2 fresh towels each, the locker is only 20p refundable and the drinks (we got 2 peppermint teas) were 50p each!
Unfortunately, grateful as I am to the great service and alert staff, the place was filthy.
It stank of (sorry theres no other way to describe it….) poo. This smell is common from what i hear and staff genuinely did take it into account when i mentioned it. The water fountain did not work- the water basically dribbled out and that is less than ideal for when your coming out a steam room or spa!
Also, all of the deck chairs (about 12 of them) were all broken so you couldnt recline them at any of the chooseable angles, you could only have them straight.
I felt kind of embarassed taking a girl there, and made up for it by some of our own steamroom activities IN A HYGIENIC WAY dont worry i left it clean….
Respectfully, The building is a listed building its nearly 100 years old and used to be public baths and its not allowed for them to alter it,but i dont really see why this affects their hygiene level :(
Im glad i brought flip flops, im sure id have something green growing off my feet by now if i hadnt.
It went well with the girl, but unfortunately i had to let the relationship go (at the end of the night) I felt that the magic was gone, but if you know any nice latino girls message me, thanks
Porchester spa is not a perfect place to relax but sometimes people who comes here expects too much.You have to think about that the main purpose of you coming here is to enjoy the place and its quirkiness.Be it bad or good, we are here to unwind and relax.So chill out and leave all your worries at home.And enjoy this place in the heart of central london.
I was soo looking forward to attending this spa but was shocked to find it so dirty and in such disrepair. With the added bonus of cockroaches. At £25 entry cost it is not good value for money and I really do not recommend it. To be blunt, Im shocked it is even allowed to stay open.
Despite all the negative reviews I decided to give the Porchester Spa a try this afternoon (Saturday, the all male gig). I was pleasantly surprised – the welcome was friendly and while I thought the entry was a bit steep (it’s now £25.65), I was shown how the lockers work (make a note – bring a 20p coin), given two towels and an offer of being shown around. I decided I preferred to find my own way, so changed and headed downstairs from the changing and lounging area, past the cold plunge pool to the wet area. There are four dry rooms in increasing levels of heat, two very hot steam rooms (both pretty unbearable for more than a few minutes I thought) and an equally hot sauna. Numerous shower areas and chairs to sit and cool down. The reports of the Spa being dirty are wildly exaggerated – I thought it was well maintained with good quality clean white towels provided and a general sense of being clean and orderly. Very mixed crowd (young and old, straight and gay, trim and not so trim, etc) this afternoon – but all friendly. I spoke to a couple of guys, some of who also seemed to be there for the first time. Will definitely go back and next time will probably have a treatment – this time I decided it was just for a recce! I was keen to correct the misinformation about the place being dirty and poorly maintained – that is not correct.
All these reviews saying how dirty the Porchester is are exaggerating….I’ve never seen a cockroach! It’s not shiny and new, but it’s not filthy, I would suggest bringing your own flip flops & robe. Where else can you get a relaxing pampering afternoon for £24? Sauna, steam rooms, tepidarium, plunge pool and fantastic treatments available (esp. the Porchester scrub). And the treatments aren’t mega bucks. If you know of somewhere you can get all that for that kind of price AND emaculate surroundings, tell us all! The food is reasonably priced (unlike almost everywhere else in that area), basic but tasty, and the staff are lovely. One reviewer commented that the surroundings are part of the experience….I agree wholeheartedly. The building and interior are beautiful if a little shabby round the edges, that’s part of what I love about it. If they ruin it by making it clinical or, God forbid, close it down, I shall be most upset. The people leaving these terrible reviews must be very spoilt!
No stars from us ! (but I had to put one)
We were so looking forward to a nice day in a spa... but what we got was more than horrible. Honestly we should have read the reviews before spending any pennies for a dirty, mouldy smelling, boring place. Every proper gym has better saunas and steam rooms and much cheaper as well. I really can't understand why that place is still running they should shut it down even though it's the oldest spa in London.
We are deeply disappointed and hope not too many others will have such a creepy experience with that spa.
This is a beautiful space, the deco plunge pool and the architecture are gorgeous. I also get the concept - it is an authentic baths - municipal, real and so not contrived and overdone. However it is shabby and worn out, again some might see this as authenticity. But it is also dirty and broken; the lockers do not lock, the showers are filthy with hair and debris, the floors aren't clean, there is left over food on the tables. All of which just make the experience unrelaxing which is just not what a spa / baths experience should be. Even at a municipal swimming pool the floors are mopped and the showers are cleaned - by the end of the session we went to, the place was just unhygenic and unpleasant. Sure it is not a hotel spa - but it is £24 for a session - which is not a negligable cost. Overall after being a regular attendee I found the decline too much, the filth too hard to overlook (have lived with the cockroaches up till now) and will not be returning. Which is shame as a great female space. It is a loss when it could (and has so in the not too distant past) be done so well.
This is a Turkish Baths. If you want to be pampered by Barbie Dolls in white coats in a sterile environment whist you wear a spangly bikini this is not the place for you. If you suck on the very, very occassional cockroach you'll get ill. If you're fearful of pubic hair, stay away. However, if you're comfortable around women (or men) of all shapes, sizes and cultures, including people whose culture invented these baths and know why and how to use them, you'll feel comfortable. The attendants will tell you to be quiet if you start yelping in the punge pool or squeeling like children so that the rest of us can get on with being adults in a beautiful, historic, functional environment.
I won’t give it five stars because, as others have mentioned in their one star reviews (one star - rather an overreaction surely), the furniture is lousy and the chatter loud; the toilets and the pool are accessed via some corridors and stairs; it looks dirty on occasion. But embrace those things! Let yourself go a bit and you'll love it. I love that its single sex and love that the regulars chat to you (chat you up?!). I have only been a few times but I'd heartily recommend it to anyone.
If you are looking for a modern, corporate spa go elsewhere. There are some lovely ones. But if you are looking for somewhere with some soul this is the place. I first heard about it when I read the token male column in the times and he said something along the lines of: if you are looking for a place where they don’t just take your money and throw you out after 3 hours go here. He also gave a few wonderfully evocative anecdotes about the clientele that have borne out.
I must admit - the staff were very friendly and helpful....given that we had to leave after 10 minutes of being in the spa, they still smiled and assisted us with our girevances.
Sadly i should have read these poor reviews before going...but given that i hadnt, i stepped right into trap!
It's an old spa - this is true - but it is also a dirty one. It is safe to say that there is indeed a cockroch problem here...the steam rooms smell awfully like public toilets...and the showers (3/4) and changing facilities (3 wooden boxes) have that 'school swimming pool in the 40s' feel to them. ie..cramped and about to fall apart!
Take a look around before paying a visit...you will most definitely not stay!
One word...Cockroaches, yes these were complimentary at the Porchester Spa, saw a few running round the place like it was their holiday resort ...okay i was not expecting The Sanctuary standards ..but this was too much, had to ask for a refund which they gave me!! Also one women ..can't call her a lady, was shaving her bikini line in full view at the sinks near the showers! Please women some things you don't do in in public!!! The good thing i can say was the Porchaser Body Scrub treatment was good value for money...
We went to the Spa for my sisters hen weekend, all looking forward to a relaxing day, and had all booked massages.
The place was such a huge disappointment, more than that, it was so dirty and it smelt very badly of damp and worse smells, like public toilets. The steam rooms had plastic industrial kitchen style curtains at the entrance which we didnt want to touch as they looked like they hadn't been cleaned since the spa opened, and we didn't particularly wish to breathe in the steam as there was a very unpleasant smell. This may have been beareable, but the swimming pool was not the relaxing place which you would expect - in fact it was a public pool with swimming lanes set up! The last straw was that the Turkish hot rooms were out of order, so all that was offered were two steam rooms and a small sauna. The menu on the green plastic garden furniture which occupies the 'relaxation room' offered 'Spud u like' and sandwiches, not the menu you would expect at a spa. The 'kitchen area' was at the edge of the room and the smell of frying sausages came through as you were attempting to relax on the few plastic sun loungers.
We left after half an hour, before the rest of the party, including the hen, had arrived, as we couldn't let them waste their money. We asked for a refund and detailed why we were unsatisfied, and the receptionist and one of the people who worked there seemed very unsuprised, but wouldn't give us a refund as the manager was not around. They also said they were thinking about re-naming it as a Turkish bath as the name 'Spa' was misleading - however as the Turkish hot rooms were out of order this would have been even more misleading! They also had the cheek to try and make us pay for the massages we were not having as we were supposedly required to cancel them 24 hours in advance - something which they hadn't told us over the phone. Obviously we refused, and they didn't make muc fuss. All i can assume is that they were very used to people being dissatisfied.
Had a good day and the spa was tidy although it could have benefited from a bit more attention to detail. The steam room was quite full and the chattering quite loud but as I enjoy a good chinwag I didn't mind too much, although if you went there for peace and quiet you wouldn't get any. It was nice and I may go back again in the future.
STEAM SOAP SILK. Our third Sunday visit!! and as such we notice little things that pass you by on a first or second visit. The lights are film set bright. The lockers are like summer camp. The rest beds are cheap plastic. And I am sure you're thinking "Aha, so why go?" Because this is an experience that we find is unique and unbeatable in the steam room "shmeise", or just sitting in the hot steam while wrapped in a cold towel. The camaraderie created by people simply at ease with themselves Thin, fat, tall, young, not so young. We have been to countless spa's and the simplicity of just being there is "The Experience ". Tip, take a robe and beach shoes. Tip, ask for Shmeise as they don't offer it unless you ask. Actually that's one of the attractions. Nobody chases you to do treatments or services. Tip, give your self plenty of time. Our forth visit. The place has been let down. The treatments are great, lee is shmeising and for that alone its worth a visit and on the Sunday still serving free, cold melon to his clients, and anyone nearby. However the place is simply dirty . The management is blatantly not spending any money and it shows. I checked out the web site and its owned by Westminster council. Its run by Nuffield health that run hospitals, scary. However its still a great place to spend a Sunday afternoon. Massage 5 stars Atmosphere 5 stars. Floor spotless. Walls, ceilings fittings broken dirty. Tried complaining told verbal message would be passed on. No form. Such a shame a once great lady now in rags
The Porchester may be the oldest spa in London but is probably the most dirty one.
I went on Sunday with my husband and the place was smelling like a deep fryer.
The food in the kitchen wasn't good either.
I wouldn't recommend going to this Spa. Please go somewhere else.
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